the waiting game...

the countdown officially begins!! yesterday, i had my weekly midwife appointment ( @ 36 1/2 wks). everything is looking great with baby and me! the baby's heartrate was in the 150's. i am measuring right on schedule. and her head is down, just where it should be!!! when my midwife checked me i was already dilated 1 -2 cm. and her head is really low - she could feel it. which i thought was the case, and explains my discomfort and pressure lately.

so now we just wait!!!! waiting is a hard thing for me. i am extremely impatient and like to have a plan. but i am going to try to keep as busy as my energy level will allow and i know the big day will be here before i know it.

of course, we are predicting that she will be here in about a week and a half. she seems to be following the course of her big brother, jesiah, who came about 2 weeks early. but then i could be all wrong and she may make her appearance at the end of october!

four seasons of pregnancy...

i have officially been pregnant during all four of the seasons of 2008!! i found out the big news in february/winter -- big sweaters and sweatshirts were perfect attire for an expanding tummy!!! i pretty much sailed through the spring although morning sickness and exhaustion got the best of me a few times. summer was blazing hot for me especially with my own internal heater, but being in the pool was a great way to cool down and feel weightless. and now i welcome this fall weather - it is such a big relief to not be sweaty everytime i walk outside!!! wow, four seasons of being pregnant!

who really knows who many weeks left???

yesterday, i had my midwife appointment. i am 35 1/2 weeks and everything is going great. i saw my midwife who delivered jesiah! i just love her. i actually love all of the midwives at our practice. when i was pregnant with my first 2 babies, i saw the doctors and they are fabulous too. i just decided with my third to give the midwives a try since my pregnancies, labors and deliveries were fairly uncomplicated. i have been very pleased with our midwives. i actually look forward to each of my appointments, with the exception of "weighing in".

my friend patti met me at my appointment and she watched jesiah in the waiting room while i went in by myself!! the baby is in position, head down! and her heart rate is wonderful! i am measuring right at 35-36 weeks and everything is good with me! what a blessing.

we talked a little about my weight gain this time - of course i brought it up, my midwife didn't have any concerns. i don't look like i have gained a lot , but i feel like i have and the numbers show i have gained the most out of all my pregnancies. i decided yesterday that i am not going to worry about it. this is probably my last baby and i am not going to stress about it!

we also talked a little about labor and delivery and some plans for that! it got me thinking about that day and i realized it could be sooner than later. jesiah was born at 38 weeks and i am nearly 36 weeks so i could potentially give birth in two weeks or so! josh and jordyn were both just three days early so that puts me at a little over 3 weeks to go. wow!!!

now, i know each baby is different and she could decide to be 2 weeks late and make her appearance in november !!!

so, of course i have begun preparations for the big day. jamil and i made plans for the big day, and how to juggle the big kids and get to the hospital. i started packing my bag - thanks to my parents who bought me a beautiful vera bradley overnight bag for my birthday! and of course i have lists of things to do before the big day!!!

next week i will go back to the midwives, i will start going every week now! this pregnancy has gone so fast, i can not believe we are at the end of it already!

6 weeks or less...

ok, so it hit me today as i turned 34 weeks prego! if (a big IF) this baby is early like her big brother, we could possibly meet her in 4 weeks! ok, so panic then washed over me. so many mixed emotions. i am ready to see her and hold her and be done with not sleeping well and feeling uncomfortable. but i do have a lot to do before she comes and a lot to get. although, we have been making good progress around the house with my project lists - there is always something to be done and something we need to buy!!

it is sooooo hot today and just walking outside is miserable. i am hot when i am in the a/c and even hotter when i am outside -- i am so ready for some cooler weather. it will make breathing so much easier. she is sitting up so high, my lungs are squished. i also have a very sore rib cage from her being so high!! oh the joys of sharing your body with someone else!!

but everytime she kicks or squirms - i am still amazed that there is a little person inside of me!! even though we are both running out of room. the miracle of life is awesome.

oh my... i still have 7 weeks to go???

are you kidding me? today is a day where my emotions are completely different about this pregnancy. today is a day where i am ready to have this baby out of me. i am so uncomfortable and tired that i don't know how i will make it another week let alone seven.

i haven't been sleeping that well at night. and i woke up very cranky and tired this morning. my hormones are on overdrive. and i have very little patience for anything or anybody. i went to my 33 week check up this morning. when my midwife walked in and asked how i was doing, i broke down in tears. i completely lost it. and there wasn't any real reason that i cried. it was just everything combined with the raging hormones.

everything is going well with the baby - she is healthy and happy and still head down. i am measuring right at 33 weeks, although i wish i measured at like 38 weeks. her heartrate sounded great.

as for me, i just feel fat, uncomfortable and tired. my iron count went up two points. which is good. and my weight was up as well. which means the baby is growing right along with me.
i can barely breathe i am carrying her so high and yet i have a tremendous amount of pressure going on that radiates to my thighs. it is uncomfortable to sit, i am too tired to stand and if i lay too long or the wrong way i have pain in my hips. so today, i just feel plain miserable and can't believe i have 7 weeks until i can get some relief.

i am so emotionally torn because i don't want to be miserable for the rest of the pregnancy - i want to enjoy it. but today is just not a day where i feel happy. i feel blessed to have a healthy baby but just not happy. hopefully tomorrow will be a better day...